Scared shameless

I get frights easily. Not just "ooh scary movie something's under the bed" frights, more "ooh comedy movie the kettle just made a noise" scary.

Slamming doors, cats under cars, being woken up, and often, my mobile phone ringing send me gasping and staggering around like a vampire in daylight.

My insides get that feeling you get in the 2 seconds between tripping up and finding your feet again, where everything's in slow motion, you think you are going to die or smash your teeth on the pavement so start running through the scenarios of how the paramedics will revive you or cosmetically enhance you; before your adrenalin kicks in and you find your feet, only to leave you with that "gee that was a close one" look on your face, and feel like a ninja for the next 10 mins.

Last night when out with friends we were standing in a group and I was looking at something else. I gasped worse than a Nana in a nightclub coz the tallest guy was standing next to me when I turned around. See when this happened, it was a double whammy of embarrassment because I get the fright, have a small seizure, then laughed at my reaction: I "lol'd" the living daylights back into me.

(My laugh is a whole different blog altogether)

Anyways, the "Edinburgh by night haunted tour" sounded like a hoot, I found t'was frightfully fantastic and as well as educational it was highly entertaining. 

For everyone apart from me. 

The theatrical tour guide found my Achilles heel (everything in the dark) and was not scarce with the scary voices.  Scottish accents are scary enough but she had great timing- was an absolute scream.

The tour finished just before midnight, and to my defright I got to walk home alone. In the dark. Past the castle, a cliff and a churchyard. 

I tried to think of happy things like puppies, marshmallows and lol cats, but scenes from a horror movie kept playing on repeat in my mind, like the crazy frog ring tone. 

 

And then I asked myself- "am I going to be a scardy cat forever?"  I don't think I actually have lots of fear, just poor reactions.

I mean, I am fine with spiders, slugs, some scary films and spew.

Just anything sudden startles me to the point of stupidity, especially when it's a tap on the shoulder from a cute guy trying to get past me at a bar. 

I guess "shit, you scared me" beats "you come here often?" In terms of an icebreaker. Depending on the magnitude of the fright it could be a nose breaker.

 I fear the day.

Jk