The Hangover

Seedy, sifty, hanging, overhang, brown bottle flu, hurtin, wine flu, with the throb, fur-tongued, needing grease.......

These are a few common ways to describe how I am feeling right now. I can't make any promises for how this post is going to turn out as it feels like my head has a small child in it whose shoes light up when they stomp, so the child feels the need to stomp all the time. I have used the good old copy paste function to get most of the content of this blog, because aside from that and eating corn chips, that's all I can manage.

The Urban dictionary defines a Hangover as:

Nausea and headaches often caused by way too much f****ng alcohol. Can be identified by the ashtray in ones mouth,the vomit on last nights clothes,the want to never drink or eat again,the great dislike of sunlight, the undesirealbe urge to apologise to all the people you spent the night with, the stranger in your bed and need for a glass of water and many many asprin.

I did not wake up to a stranger in my bed but a bowl that looked like it contained some kind of cereal with icecream, probably with extra chia seeds in there to try get those superfood magic powers at 3am... 

Wikipedia says:

While the causes of a hangover are still poorly understood,^[2] several factors are known to be involved includingacetaldehyde accumulation, changes in the immune system and glucose metabolism, dehydration, metabolic acidosis, disturbed prostaglandin synthesis, increased cardiac output, vasodilation, sleep deprivation and malnutrition. Beverage specific effects of additives or by-products such as congeners also play an important role.^[1] The symptoms occur typically after the intoxicating effect of the alcohol begins to wear off, generally the morning after a night of heavy drinking.^[3]

Interesting, but ohhhhh the pain.

I really don't know how much more I can punch out right now. "But what's the point of writing Jj, if you aren't going to commit to completing it?" you say.

I don't really have an answer, I'm too busy scrolling my newsfeed to make sure I didn't get comment happy in the cab on the way home.

Oh no that's right, I wasn't on my phone in the cab, I was eating chips.

Is there a moral here? Am I going to say I'm not drinking to excess again? Can I do the whole rap section of Shaggy's "It wasn't me?"

The answer to those questions three is : NOT YET. 

There's not a moral yet because I haven't planned this blog, just like I hadn't planned to factor my hangover into today's workload.

I'm not going to say I'm not drinking to excess yet because I do it once in a blue moon and the last time I did it was my cousin's wedding where it was fantastic NZ wine and I woke up with a sour fejoa lolly stuck to my back (seeing a trend here) and that time and last night were BUCKETS OF FUN.

Nothing else went into the buckets too. 

I can't do the whole rap section of Shaggy's "It wasn't me" yet because I had the lyrics up on the kitchen wall so when I'm working at the counter I could practice but someone took them down and I asked everyone in the household about it and they just said

"It wasn't me"

Jj

Just some of the super stuff my siblings taught me.....

"To the outside world, we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other's hearts. We share private family jokes. We remember family feuds and secrets, family griefs and joys. We live outside the touch of time." - Clara Ortega

I am fortunate enough to be the youngest of four children. Even though my parents think the best present they bought us was the trampoline, I think the best present we got was each other (I guess I inherited them as I was born last but technicalities aren't the driving thoughts of this post.)

All my three siblings' (and my mother's) birthdays fall in May. So really, May is about celebrating he people who have known me my whole life, the people who are the most influential on who I am. 

This May, they are all in the Northern Hemisphere, either living or travelling, and since a the blog dedications to my mum and dad last year went down pretty well I think I'd best compile a sibling version.......

These are lessons based on actual childhood memories or things they have taught me

1. If you run away, you will get lost
2. Showing off doesn't get you far
3. Patience- 4 kids, 6 hours, 1 gameboy in the car
4. Don't tell tales or cry for attention
5. Respect your elders and wait your turn
6. You might be small, but you can still be brave
7. Be competitive, be your best
8. How to eat a biscuit silently
9. Making false claims like that you can sing better than Maria in "The Sound of Music" will result in tears
10. How to steer a go cart
11. How to make a mix tape
12. How to catch, tackle, do a flip and flip a pancake in the air
13. Learn on the job
14. Sometimes, you have to start again
15. Don't give in to other people's smoke, mirrors and bribery
16. Loyalty
17. Dressing up like an old lady to go to church is a great way to pass the time
18. Don't stuff your bra
19. Ultimately, it's a game
20. Empathy
21. How to be a good host
22. Shining light from mirrors or reflective surfaces into people's eyes is not cool
23. How to be a good partner
24. Always have a designated spot for your keys and your passport
25. How to be so proud to be part of something so awesome
26. Allow time for your mates
27. No matter how uncool you think they are, always stick by your parents
28. To love someone unconditionally even when they set your hair on fire and put your nose in the microwave

 "Brothers and sisters are as close as hands and feet." - Vietnamese Proverb

Happy Birthday guys 
Jj xx

The correlation between housemates and dates

I have successfully completed the joyful hunt that is finding a housemate. Previously I have been the one finding the house, which is a social experiment in itself; being invited into people's homes, trying to make the best impression in the shortest amount of time (at one house inspection I opened a bottle of beer with a spoon, casual as) and talking openly about what time of the day you shower.

To aid in my housemate hunt, I used a few online mediums; gumtree, Facebook and flatmatefinders.com.au. On Flatmate finders, you make a profile, tick boxes about you interests, and preferences, and then they match you with people that are compatible.

You put pictures on your profile (ones that show what you are like, maybe with friends, a glass of wine, your dog.) A blurb about yourself (how you like to keep fit and healthy, what you like to do on the weekends, that you are easy going, like movies and gigs)...  and you can shortlist, give people stars to rate your level of interest, and message people via the site or sms.

For a small fee it has made the housemate hunt pretty easy, and when you deactivate your profile you have to put who you have become housemates with, it's a quality service that makes it easier than putting yourhouse out there and meeting them face to face and inviting them back to your place.

It's pretty similar to online dating.
You put pictures on your profile (ones that show what you are like, maybe at the beach, with a coffee, or friends) A blurb about yourself (what you do for a living, how you like to keep fit and healthy whilst enjoying going to restaurants and bars, that you are easy going and get along with most people) and you can favourite and chat to people who are screened as compatible or close to you. 

I mean, we all want to make everyone know that we enjoy the outdoors, chilling out with a glass of wine and sunsets on the beach, regardless of whether we are wanting to be co-habitants or confidants or conjoined......

To sum up the correlation I have found these pictures, which pretty much speak louder and more ironically than any more words I can offer.

JJ